Confirmed: Kin One and Two are returning to Verizon. Wait, what?

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Unbelievably, against all odds and better judgment, we are able to
independently confirm that Microsoft's short-lived Kin One and Kin Two
are coming back for an encore performance on Verizon, possibly as soon
as this quarter -- but it won't quite be the same product you remember
from earlier this year. The phones were famously bashed for the
unrealistic plan pricing model that put them head-to-head with actual,
full-fledged smartphones -- despite the fact that the devices were
targeted squarely at tweens, teens, and twentysomethings -- and we're
hearing that the revised phones will be totally, completely debundled
from data services. Data-centric features like the Loop "are out,"
we're told -- but the good news is that you'll still be able to use
one of the product's most redeeming qualities, Zune Pass, over WiFi if
you're not signed up for a proper data plan. Of course, the value
proposition of a Kin without... well, without its only value
proposition is questionable at best, so we're thinking this might just
be a way to clear huge backlogs of hardware inventory before pulling
the plug on the program. Seriously, who wants a Kin without the
unlimited photo uploads?